He Drives Me Crazy
by cam the fan
Summary: Kaoru is in love with Hikaru, but Hikaru doesn't know. What will Kaoru do when he sees something that makes him want to end it all? And how do the rest of the Host Club members play in? Read and find out. Waning. Yaoi and Twincest in later chapters. Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot. HikaruXHaruhi and HikaruXKaoru and slight TamakiXKaoru
1. Chapter 1

Here I lay, in my dark room, alone. That's how its always been, me alone. I can't remember a time when I was with anyone else. I have seen people come and go, even though I know they would, it hurt. It always hurt, no matter how many times you've experienced it. You keep telling yourself don't get too attached, and eventually, you learn how. People may think that I like being alone, when really its the opposite. I want someone to laugh with, to talk to, to hold, and to call my own. I want a companion.

I hold my two saviors in front of me, but I'm trying to decide what to do first. One glows orange when I hold it in my mouth and breathe. The other always glints a pretty silver in any sort of light. I decide the silver friend is better, and roll up the smooth fabric covering my pale limb. I hold it to my wrist and gently glide it across. I take a look at how many other times this angel has helped. I watch as my own crimson fluid pours out and over my arm as if it is a canvas. I am in a state of relief when I realize I'm neglecting another of my 'friends'. I take the lighter and light the magic stick. I inhale and feel my thirst for it quench. I am in a blissful state until I hear a knock at my door.

"Bro, it's me, why are you in your room?" he asks.

He must know something is wrong. We usually both sleep in his room, but lately I've wanted to be alone. I know why, but he's to oblivious to see my reason.

"Just needed to think" I reply, thankful he can't see the state I'm in right now.

Blood had already stopped pouring from my wound as I quickly put out the cigarette and opened my window. I then went to the connected bathroom and covered up my whole arm with some of my mother's make-up /i my face is still flushed from almost being caught in the act.

"Well come out, I've finished my homework and I want to hang out" he said as I was in the middle of my make-up job.

"Okay, hold on. I'm in the bathroom" I call back rushing my application.

I see hate horrifying job I did in the rush and mentally yell at myself. h well, it will have to do for now. I turned off the light s I excited the bathroom and thought for a second. Do I really need to see him? Could I fake sickness long enough for him to leave? Would he leave? I pondered these thoughts before deciding I would hang out with him.

"There you are" he says as I exit my room.

I followed behind him as he led the way down the hall to his room. As soon as I cross the threshold I am overwhelmed by his scent. I walk across the wood floor, and over to the TV where he has the console started.

We played for hours and /i won more times than I lost and he whined about me cheating. I brush it off as him being emotionally childish and a bad loser.

"Admit it, you cheated!" he said crossing your arms.

"I don't have anything to admit. But you..." I trail off because I know it will anger him.

"What?, huh, what do I have to admit?" he asks getting closer to me.

I could feel his warm breath on my face. Mint. He must have brushed his teeth before he came and got me.

"That you love Haruhi!" I say accusing him jokingly.

He blushed, a lot actually. I couldn't believe I got that right. He was as red as a tomato, but so was I. But my pigment had to deal with the fact that I was laughing.

No...No I'm not" He said stammering. I had him right where I want him.

"You so do, it's so obvious" I say with a teasing tone.

It actually hurt to say everything, but I tried not to let it show. Yet I knew he loved her and not me so why was I upset about where this conversation was heading? It was wrong for me to love him, and I know that. I still loved him, even thought it was forbidden and even though he didn't love me back.

Is it wrong if I do?" he asked as his face got even more red.

"No, in fact I'm happy for you" I lie.

"You are!?" he asked i what I can guess is disbelief.

"Yes Hikaru. I am" I say with a smile. A very good fake smile.

"Kaoru, I'm tired" he whined while yawning.

"Okay Hikaru, hold on a sec." I say grabbing my pajamas.

I looked over to Hikaru as I undressed and noticed he was staring at me quizzically. I smirked, inwardly, and continued to undress. I was in my boxers when Hikaru's stare turned from quizzical to confusion. Confusion suited him better anyway. I got redressed and climbed into bed with him. He turned out the light and I remembered that he still had his clothes on.

"Isn't that uncomfortable?" I ask.

"Not really" he replied snuggling into me.

"Alrighty then" I say copying him.

He proceeded to throw his arm over my waist and hold me tight. I blushed but thanks to the darkness, I was hidden. I waited until his breathed was controlled and heavy, then I tuned over to look at his face in the moonlight. He really was stunning, it was almost as if the light lived inside his skin. I couldn't hold back, not from this sight. I leaned in ever so slowly and kissed him.

I turned away right after and fell asleep. At least I now know what his lips taste and feel like. Perfection!

I awoke alone and decided to go to my room to get ready. I was in my room when I felt the hated feeling again. I wanted to get rid of it immediately so I ran to the bathroom and found my favorite savior.

I looked at it glinting in the artificial light. I bared my wrist and held it up against my ivory limb. I pressed hard and slid it across my wrist and felt relief almost instantly. I backed up into wall then slid down it as I watched the red liquid pour out and onto my arm. I don't even care that it's making a mess on the floor, I was in too much of a blissful state to care.

"Kaoru, you in there?" his voice breaks me from my dreamlike trance.

"Yeah, just going to get a shower" I said standing up.

I stood up a little too fast and got really dizzy. I stumbled around and tried to grab hold of something to steady myself. I couldn't find anything and ended up falling and hitting my head on something. Right before losing consciousness, I saw a terrified face that matched my own.

"Hi...Hikaru" I managed before everything faded to black.

I couldn't help but feel worried for him. But maybe this was for the best. Now I wouldn't hold him back from being with Haruhi. And she is good for him. Way more useful to him then I could ever be. At least he never knew I loved him more than a brother. I would die of embarrassment if he knew my secret.

I am Kaoru Hitachiin and I'm in love with my twin brother.

_**Author's**** Note:**_ This is my first Ouran fic and I hoped you liked it. Leave a review telling me what you think. Please no flames, but constructive criticism is very much appreciated. Until next time. Bye Guys/Gals!

**_END OF CHAPTER_**


	2. Chapter 2

**Review Responses-**

_** : Here it is! Hope you enjoy**_

_**EmotionalPrincess: Hope this chapter pleases you as well as the first one did**_

_**machi-pan: I can take it for short and it wasn't an embarrassment. I loved that story. Here's the second chapter.**_

* * *

I'm running. Running after the only thing that mattered. The only thing that kept me living. The face of my Hikaru. The faster I ran, the faster he ran. I knew I would never catch him so I gave up. I sat down and tears immediately were streaming down my face, hoping he would come back for me. I then heard my own voice running through my head.

"He'd never love you! You're a sick pervert" it chanted.

"Please stop" I begged.

It was of no avail. They were still chanting and making more tears spill my eyes.

"Kaoru" they said softly.

"No please stop. Stop the torture" I scream.

"Kaoru, wake up" it said in soothing tone.

"Huh, what?" I ask as my eyes snap open from that hellish nightmare.

"Kao, you were having a nightmare" he says bringing me into a loving embrace.

That's just it though. To him it was just brotherly, but to me it was more. It was love, no matter how much I didn't want it to be. I broke the embrace as tears formed in my eyes. He lifted my chin up so we were staring into each others' identical eyes. He then lifted his thumb and wiped away the tear stains on my face.

"It's okay I'm here" he says pulling me into another hug.

Little did he know that he was slowly killing me. The hugs were like knives piercing my heart. His words were bullets that ripped through my skin. And his brotherly gestures were fists that had an endless barrage of punches on me. But he couldn't help it. He didn't know that I was madly in love with him.

It was then that I noticed the gown I was in,and the I.V. in my arm. ~Great, I'm in a hospital~ I thought, still being squeezed by Hikaru.

"Kao, don't scare me like that" Hikaru said squeezing tighter.

"Sorry Hika, I didn't think I would fall" I admit laughing to myself.

"Why did you cut yourself in the first place?" he asks lifting my head we could see eye to eye. I notice he had tears in his eyes.

"Just...I...It doesn't matter" I finally managed.

"It so does matter" he replied with worried look.

"Not doesn..."

"Hikachan!, Kaochan! Are you in here?" came the familiar child-like voice.

"Over here Honey-senpai" I reply quickly.

I wanted Honey over here so I could have a reason to ignore Hikaru's questions.

Honey appeared, not so long after, atop of Mori-senpai's shoulders. Typical.

"Kaochan!" he yells as he leaps onto me with his arms wide open.

"Whoa, Honey, don't break him" Hikaru chuckled.

"Kaoru, why would you do something like this?" came a familiar voice.

"Ah, Haruhi, great to hear your voice" I lie. "I'm assuming the other two are here as well" I say with a smile. I couldn't tell whether it was real or fake.

"Yes they are. Now answer my question" Haruhi replied not letting my change the subject.

I tense because I couldn't find a suitable lie. Honey notices I tensed up and looks up into my eyes. ~I'll have to give him the information later~ I thought smiling.

"It really doesn't matter" I say without giving it a second guess.

"Kaoru, you almost **DIED**! It **does** matter. **You** matter!" He yelled before Haruhi could utter a reply.

"I...I matter?" I was fake, I knew I mattered . Just not how much I mattered.

"Of course you matter! You're my entire world!" he says now squeezing the life out of me.

I couldn't be his entire world. Haruhi is there for him along with everyone else.

"May I please have a moment with Kaoru?" Kyoya interrupted.

Wait, Kyoya? When did he come in? And why does he want to speak to me? But oddly enough everyone left, much to Hikaru's dismay.

"Kaoru, this isn't the first time, is it?"

"No" I reply with my head towards the floor.

Why? What could make you, of all people do this?" he asked taking a step towards me.

"Because...Because...Because I love Hikaru. More than a brother should. But he likes Haruhi, and I never even had a shot from the get go. Now he has new friends and doesn't need me" I say as tears start to well in my own eyes.

"Is that what you think? That he doesn't need you? You matter to him more than you could ever know. You matter to all of us because we are a family" Kyoya said putting a hand gently on my shoulder.

"It doesn't matter anyway, he likes Haruhi, so I should be happy for him" I reply with a big frown.

"You're a strong person Kaoru, please don't kill yourself. You really are loved dearly by all of us" Kyoya said as he exited the room.

It didn't take long after that for everyone to pile back in. Hikaru tried to leap to me, but Haruhi's hand that was holding his, kept him back. Wait! They're holding hands!? SHIT! Why me?

"Kao, me and Haruhi are...Going out" he finally finished with one of his Hikaru smiles. It wasn't one of his fake smiles either, it was a true beautiful Hikaru smile.

"Wonderful" I say with a true fake smile.

It broke my heart into a million pieces to hear that phrase leave his mouth.

Kyoya heard the confession and and looked over at me with sorrowful eyes.

"Kaochan, do you want some cake?" Honey asked with his childlike smile.

"No, I'm not all that hungry. Thanks anyway though" I

Everyone looked at me weirdly. It was because I had never turned down food before. Oh well, I needed to lose some weight anyway.

Every starts talking about the club, but not a single person tries to involve me in the conversation. I just sit there listening to them go on and on, but cant my eyes off the most beautiful thing in the room. Hikaru.

"Kaoru, what do you think?" I hear Kyoya ask me, breaking my trance.

_**Author's Note: So what did you think. Leave a review to be mentioned in the top of the next chapter. Hope you enjoyed this and Chapter 3will be up soon as well. Or at least when I get three reviews! Until then, See ya!**_

_**END OF CHAPTER**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Reviews from Last Chapter:**_

_** :**** I'm glad you enjoy it so far here is the next chapter**_

_**Kaycee**__** Columbell: **__**Thank you for reviewing and here is what you've been waiting for.**_

_**Knowledgewhore:**__** Thank you for the compliments. It's nice to know there are people out there that I can make exceptions for. Here is Chapter 3!**_

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_**Laharls Vassal:**__** You're waiting is now over. Here is Chapter 3, hope you enjoy!**_

"Huh? What's happening?" I ask as my face turns a nice bright red.

"Discontinuing the brotherly love act" Hikaru said staring me down.

"Well, if Hikaru wants it, then so be it" I reply calmly while I lye back down.

Kyoya then looked my way with an expression that I couldn't describe all that well. It was sort of a mix between admiration and worry. I then turned my head to look at my brother, Big Mistake! Him and his new girlfriend were lip-locking. I quickly turned away so no one would see the tears forming in my eyes. Honey noticed me turn away, so he came up and hugged me.

"Mister Kaoru Hitachiin, you may go home now" A blonde nurse said upon entering the room.

"Thanks Akoro" Kyoya said looking over towards her.

They tried to help me up, but I only accepted two people's offers. Honey and Kyoya both grabbed one of my hands and helped me up. I then, with their help,hobbled out of the room. Tamaki was already spewing some crap about me and how losing me would affect him.

"Tono, I'm tired. Please be quiet" I say almost pleading.

"Kao, you're coming home so we can talk about this" Hikaru all but shouted when we exited the building.

"I don't really see the need to talk about it" I say climbing into out limo.

"Kao, I almost lost you. I need to know why you almost left me" he said looking into my eyes.

It was a silent drive on the way home. Hikaru just stared into my eyes looking fir something. Anything to tell him why I had cut myself. Little dd he know, all he had to do was look in a mirror.

"Kaoru, I want to help you" he said with a glossy look in his eyes.

"You can't Hika" I say trying not to look into his irresistible eyes.

"Kao, I can try, just let me try" he said placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Hika, you can't help me. No one can, just date Haruhi and be happy. Forget about me and go be happy" I say whispering the last part.

"Kaoru, is that what this is about?" he asks lifting my head so our eyes meet.

"Yes, you've been around her so much recently that you've forgotten about be happy Hikaru, date Haruhi, forget about me, and be happy" I say right to his face.

"Kao...I...I didn't mean to" he never finished.

We pulled into our driveway at that point and I bolted out of the limo. I ran though the front door, past the maids, and into our room. Yes OURS! I wanted his help, but he couldn't give it to me in the way I desired. I wanted his love, I wanted it all to myself. But I couldn't have it because he loves Haruhi. Ihear him enter the room, but I don't look up. I'm too busy sobbing into my open palms.

"Kaoru?" he asks walking closer to me.

"Kaoru, if you want, I'll spend the whole day with you tomorrow" he said gently sitting down next to me.

I scoot away a little. I will do anything to keep me from doing something irreversible. I don't want to do anything to make him hate me. I couldn't live another second if I found out he hated me. He noticed I scooted away so he scooted closer and wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug.

My face turned bright red and I tried to hide my flushed face. I didn't want him to see me like this. I'm so weak. I couldn't even be hugged by him without blushing.

"Kaoru, I love you" he whispered into my ear.

I knew he didn't mean it in the way I wanted him to. He meant it as a brother. It drove me insane to see how close we were, yet we couldn't do anything further than hug each other. How I deeply wanted to caress and roam his body, but I simply couldn't. He would hate me and push me away.

"I love you too" I reply.

Little did he know, I meant it in the most intimate way. I yawned and Hikaru noticed and smiled. He then broke the hug and looked into my eyes.

"Kaoru, you need sleep" he said laying me on the bed.

I tuck my knees up and form a little ball. Hikaru turns the lights off and hops into bed next to me. He slings his arm around my waist and pulls me close to him.

He notices I'm not sleeping and is concerned. He always worried about me, when he didn't know what was wrong.

"Kao, what's bothering you?" he asked in a sort of drowsy voice.

"Nothing Hika, just go back to sleep" I reply.

"Not until you do" he said stubbornly.

I hate it when he does this. He makes it so I can't win. So I'm forced to do something I don't want to do.

"Kaoru, tell me what's wrong" he prodded.

"Hikaru, even if I did, you wouldn't be able to help" I respond.

"We never know unless you tell me" he followed.

"Hika, I know you care, but I just can't tell you" I say as tears welled in my eyes.

He gave up and pulled even closer to him. I was starting to react in ways I shouldn't. Even disgusting and dirty thoughts entered my mind every now and again.

I close my eyes and maybe after about 20 minutes, I fell asleep. But that damned reoccurring nightmare happened again. Hikaru shook me awake in a state of worry.

"Kaoru, you were saying my name" he says calmly.

"I was?" I asked. I felt a bit guilty for waking him.

"Why were you? What was your nightmare about?" he asks more concerned this time.

"I...I don't remember" I lie.

"Bull crap, Tell me!" he persisted as he pinned me to the bed.

"Fine. you left me behind, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't catch up. I called your name, hoping you would come back. But you didn't." I say almost in tears.

"Kao, I'll never leave you behind. You should know this, I will always be there" he cooed as he ran his fingers through my hair.

I hugged him tight with every ounce of strength I had. Not wanting to loosen my hold in fear I would lose it forever.

"Promise me you'll never leave me" I plead.

"I promise with all my heart" he replied.

My eyelids started to become heavy and I fell asleep in his arms. With his strong hold around me, I felt so safe. I didn't have a nightmare, but instead, I had a dream. In it me and MY Hika lived happily ever after. Even though I knew it wouldn't happen, I enjoyed the dream to it's fullest extent. Because I knew it wouldn't last forever.

_**Author's Note: **__**I have up to chapter 5 on paper and since Track is now over, I can post again. Make sure to review and I'll put you on the top of the next chapter. Until next time, Bye! :)**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Review Responses:**_

**Knowledgewhore: thank youfor reviewing and Its nice to see that I****can**** at**** least**** make**_** 1 person happy. Here's chapter 4**_

_**Story:**_

I awoke but this time I wasn't alone. He was holding me closer to him than he was last night. My shoulder and his head was near it. Had he been crying? I look over to see he had his adorable smile spread across his face. I hadn't seen that smile in years.

"Haruhi" he groaned as he held me tighter.

Of course he's dreaming of her. Her long, flowing brunette straight hair. Her sparkling brown eyes. And most of all her angelic voice. These had been things I'd heard from either classmates or Hikaru himself. But to me she was just a close friend who my live loved and not me.

"Huh...wha... Kaoru?" He asked still half asleep and groggy.

"Yeah, its me Hikaru" I say with a light smile.

"Aghhhhhh, I'm sorry" he said when he realized how right his arm was around my waist.

"Ring ring ring"

I got up to grab my phone and saw the caller ID. Kyoya.

"Hello?" I asked flipping my phone up to answer the call.

"Hiya, you doing okay?" He asked with what I can assume is concern.

"Yeah I'm fine. Yourself?" I reply nonchalantly.

"Same" he responded quickly.

It was as if by some miracle God let me have a private moment. Hikaru left to go and get breakfast. Once he was downstairs and I couldn't hear his footsteps. I lost control and started crying into the phone.

"Kaoru, what's wrong?" He asked obviously worried.

"He thought I was Haruhi and when he noticed it was me, he pushed away from me" I sobbed.

"Kaoru, I'm sorry, if you want to you can come over" he said soothingly.

"Isn't Tamaki coming over?" I asked not wanting to ruin any plans they may have had.

"He's just as worried, if not more, than me" he replied.

"Oh okay. I'll be over" I said hanging up.

-Well better get a shower- I think as I walk into the bathroom. I walked over to the shower and started the water. I had to make sure it was the right temperature, then I disrobed and stepped in. As soon as I felt the warm water Pelted my pale skin, I lost all sense and thought. It was as though I was sitting by a fire after walking outside for 30 minutes in a blizzard.

I start to soap up when Hikaru walks in. Just what I needed, him to see my tears sliding down my face. But he didn't come to see me, he just came to talk.

"Where are you going?"

"Kyoya's place"

"Why him?" He said almost yelling.

"Because at least he wants to hang outryntonget I fried back.

He was silent for a moment, then he walked closer to the shower door. -Please don't open it- I silently pleaded. I have the razor in my hand and I don't want him to see me like this. I don't want him to see all the blood and the mess.

"Kao, tomorrow were hanging out all day" he pretty much ordered.

"Sounds good" I said with a sigh of relief.

He walks our of the bathroom so I can resume my shower. I was my auburn hair while singing Defying Gravity. I reach my arms and I slowly go over them with soap, then I reach my legs and soap them up too. I had just hit the biggest part of the song when I turned off the water. I stepped out and almost slipped on the wet floor. But the blood and stopped flowing so it was make up time.

"Ring ring ring"

"Hello?" I ask.

"We have your brother. Nett us at the intersection of Kisiragi Blvrd, and Shinozaki St." A voice ordresd.

"Okay please just don't hurt him" I begged.

We won't, just do what we want and no one gets hurt"

"Okay. When?"

"A.s.a.p" they said before hanging up.

I knew excatly who to call. I needed body guards, because chances are they'd try to get the money and me. And these two were the only ones I trusted.

"Honey, some guys have Hikaru, I need you and More to protect me while the deal is happening"

"Kao chan, that's horrible, we will help you" he replied in his lovable lolita tone.

"Okay, thanks, 'The Deal' is happening at the Kisiragi and Shinozaki intersection" I say distinctly.

"We'll be there" he said before hanging up.

Now I needed to get, at the most, $10,000,000. Just in case of any financial surprises. I then walked outside and into the awaiting limo. I sent texts to everyone explaining what had happened and that I had 'body guards'.

I started to shake when I saw a black van at the above mentioned intersection. Three men were standing there waiting for me, I could tell this was supposed to be a trap.

"I'm here" I say stepping out of the car.

"I see that" the man said back with little emotion.

"Show me Hikaru!" I demand.

They went and got him from the back of the van. His hands were bound and he had tape over his mouth. I was outraged then saw two shadows hop from 1 tree to another and felt secure. But just as I returned my attention to Hikaru, they pulled the tape from him mouth.

"Owe! Run, Kaoru! Its a trap" he said telling me what I had already known.

"Now the money" the guy said sternly.

This guy seemed to be the leader. He had ripped the tape off Hikaru's mouth and left his face a stingingly bright red. He had a scar over 1 eye and wore nothing but black.

"How much?" I asked.

"How much ya got?" He replied.

"Oh no. Not falling for that one" I said with a smirk.

"$1,000,000" he said with a smile of his own.

"Here" I say handing him the seemingly small amount.

"Alright, get him boys" he ordered.

"I don't think so" I said as a flash of blonde and black cross on front of me.

The third beats quickly pound all three of them with inches of their lives. I smiled and thanked them for their help with a hug. But while I was hugging More, I noticed the leader had hiabgun pointed towards Hikaru.

I quickly rushed over and pushed Hikaru out of the way right ad he pulled the trigger. The bullet ripped through my stomach instead of his. It hurt so fycking bad that I just wanted to die, but at least bit wasn't Hikaru. But I felt as hough my insides were being torn apart and ripped out by a pair of scissors.

I fell on the ground, hard. My vision had already started fading. Honey and More quickly finished the guy off as soon as I hit pavement. Hikaru was in front of me crying and I saw a tear slip from Honey's eyes as well. But right before I lost consciousness I hears hia angellic voice.

"Kaoru No!"

_**Author's Note:**_** So what did you think fo this chapter. Leave a review also tell me if you want something to be added in with a review. I will respond to all reviews in the top of the next chapter. I posted this from my phone because my laptop is being stupid. Until next chapter, bye.**

_**END OF CHAPTER**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Review Responses:**_

Animefollower: Great to know you like the series. Here is the next chapter.

AhsyalaAuslly: Hope this Chapter will make you happy.

_**Story**_

"Beep Beep Beep"

"Ugh. Shut that off" I groan.

"Kaoru!" I heard my brother scream.

"Yes, yes, Hikaru its me. Now please shhhhh. I have a banging headache" I pleaded while holding my head in pain.

"Kao-chan, you're awake" I here the lolita boy whisper.

"Yes I am, and this is all to familiar" I say laughing at my own joke.

They both smiled and hugged me. I then noticed tear stains on Hikaru's face. Had he been crying over me? Nawww something else would've made him cry like this. Whatever it was happened today because these are still the true question is what made my dear brother cry?

"Kao, Haruhi and I broke up" he said as if reading my mind.

So that's it huh? What could Hikaru have done this time? Or was it finally Haruhi's fault for once.

"She's in love with Arai" he said dryly.

"Really? That's a shame. You guys looked good together" I responded with a sorry tone. Faked of course.

The fact that Haruhi had dumped my brother made me very angry that she broke his heart. Yet it also made me happy to know I might still have a shot. But how could she dump the most beautiful thing in the world, for some lovesick puppy?

People may think I'm conceited by calling Hikaru beautiful since were twins. But in my eyes were are the exact opposite of each other. I'm flawed and he is perfect. His hair will glow in any light and mine is always dull. His body is the perfect shape while I need to lose some weight. His voice is angelic while mine is whiney and annoying. He is the exact opposite of me and that's why I love him.

"Kao are you okay?" I hear my twin ask.

"Yeah I'm fine" I respond half heartedly.

"Are you sure" he asked making sure I wasn't lying to him.

Right before I could answer. The door swund open and there stood my doctor. He looked really serious so I was scared about what he had to tell me.

"I have to speak with you alone, Kaoru" he said forcing the others out of the room.

"What is the problem doctor?" I ask now very nervous as to why he had to tell me in private.

He sets down his clipboard and pulls a chair is now smiling, well sort of. And now I'm curious as what he has to say.

"Kaoru, little innocent Kaoru, there will be no one to come and save you" he said now smirking.

"Doc?" I asked a bit unnerved.

"Just relax. I'll do all the work dear Kaoru" he responded getting up and walking over to me.

It was then that I realized what he planned on doing. I tried to scream but he put something over my mouth so I couldnt make a sound. Tears started to form in my eyes when I finally realized I couldn't fight back. I was going to be raped and Hikaru wouldn't save me.

"Kaoru, this so your fault. If you weren't so damn attractive, I wouldn't be doing this" he whispered into my ear.

I whimpered as Hus hand went on the back side of my neck. He was untying the gown and quite quickly too. When he had undone the strings his warm breathe as on the nape of my neck. And my tears were already flowing freely down my face.

Once all the parts of the gown were undone, he roamed my torso with his hands. I wanted to scream but the gag blocked any sound from coming out. I could only sit there as he kept caressing my chest against my will.

I'm not sure how long he had been touching me, but somewhere in the midst of it, someone started banging on the door.

"Kaoru, its me open the door" they said pleadingly.

I tried to move then remembered the restraints the doctor put me in. So I stayed silent and the doctor kept on Touching me in places that made me blush even more furiously than the previous spot. Why? Why did everything bad always happen to me?

"Crash!"

I opened my recently closed eyes to see my mirror image standing in the door way.

"You bastard! Don't lay one more finger on my brother!' He growled turning his hands into fists.

The doctor removed his hands from me and instead grabbed a scalpel and held it threatingly at Hikaru.

"Mmph, mmm" I try through the makeshift gag.

Our telpathical ways must've switched on because he grabbed another sharp untensil and held it at the doctor. They just stared each other down until the doctor put his weapon down and ran from the room.

I couldn't even look at Hikaru. I felt disgusted by myself for letting that happen. But at least it was me instead of Hikaru. If me and him and sapped places, I would've stabbed that doctor.

Hikaru walked over and cut the restraints on my arms and legs. He then worked on removing the gag. And once that was gone he just hugged me. I felt him cry into my shoulder.

"Its okay Hika..."

"No its not. You were being fucking raped Kaoru!" He shouted.

"Things happen in life for a reason. Now what the reasoning behind this is, I'm not sure of" I responded squezzing tighter.

"Kao I'm soooo sorry" he said as I felt more warm water drop off his face.

"Hikaru, you had no way of knowing this was going on" I said into his ear comfortingly.

Its funny. I was the one being molested and hes the one who needs comforting. However, I was uses to it being like this. I would have bad news abiut sowmyjign in my life, and he would end up being comforted.

We sat in each other's arms for what seemed like an hour. The others filed back into the room and were shocked to say the least. A twin with noting on but a blanket that came up to his waist, holding his crying older brother. I had made sure Hika was asleep before explaining what happened.

-Time Lapse Time Lapse Time Lapse-

"Kaoru, your stay is free now" I heard Kyoya say angrily.

"Kao-chan, I'm sorry please be okay" the child like male said with tears in his eyes.

They all hugged me and trued to comfor me. But how do you comfort a rape victim? Kyoya then did something that Ive been wanting for so long. And he finally did it after 10 minutes of excruciating silence.

"Guys come on, let's leave them to sort things out" Kyoya said leaving with the other close behind.

_**Author's Note: So this was Chapter 5. Leave eme review so I know you enjoyed the story. Also Tell me if you want a good or bad ending. Leave a review so I can respond to it in the next chapter and always. See at next time.**_

_**END OF CHAPTER**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Review Responses:**_

_**KanameZeroYuki: Thank you for the compliment. Its nice to see people are happy with my story.**_

_**P.s. This story is driven by reviews. If no one reviews, then the Chapter isnt worked on as hard. I won't post as quickly, or be in the mood to continue the story. I need reviews to tell whether people are still interested. But anyway here is chapter 6.**_

_**Story:**_

I'be been waiting for him to wake up for about an hour now. He's absolutely adorable when he's sleeping. His face is so peaceful and this is how I like to see him. As I am beside him I want to look at how my cuts are doing. I glance and see that they're just little red lines by now.

He started to move but I didn't notice. I was too busy staring at my arms. I was thinking -how am I related to Hikaru when I do this to myself?- His voice ended up breaking me of my thoughts.

"Don't even think about it" he said staring at me.

"How?" I responded with no real clarity over what I was saying.

"How what?" He asked crawling closer to me.

"How am I related to you? I am nothing and you're everything anyone could want. I'm a disgrace, but you're perfect" I explained looking down.

"How can you say that about yourself?"

"Because its true. You're the exact opposite of me. You're so perfect. That why I... Never mind" I said hiding my flushed face.

"Kao, you saved me and risked your life for me. You're not a disgrace, you're my hero"

"Don't. Don't say that" I said a bit more harshly than I intended.

"Huh?"

"Don't get my hopes up for nothing. Don't get me excited then misunderstand me and hurt me" I responded more calmly than before.

"What are you talking about?" He asked lulling my head up so we saw into each other's eyes.

"Nothing, just drop it. You guys can come back in" I called hoping they'd come in and save me from the impending conversation.

"Kao, just tell me what's wrong" he demanded pinning me to the bed.

"Okay fine. I love you Hikaru. I love you more than a brother. I love your voice, your hair, your sparkling eyes, and your confidence. I know it's wrong so I've tried to keep it hidden. Happy?" I emphasize the question lot while trying to catch my breath.

"I am happy. I'm happy you told me, but I'm afraid I don't feel the same way" he said as the bothers walked in.

"A bit late you guys. Thanks for helping give me a broken heart" I said accusingly.

Honey looked surprised at did Mori. Kyoya looked dissapointed and Tamaki looked as if he were hour to cry. The couldn't have come in 2 minute sooner? No it had to be after Hikaru rejected me. Perfect timing you bunch of traitors.

"Kaoru, don't"

"Don't do what? The only thing in my life that gave me a will to live. The thing I've wanted for so many years has just denied me! I hate everything. I hate life. I hate you all!" I screamed running by all of them.

Tears stung my eyes and face as I ran from the hospital. My heart had broken into billions of pieces, then was disintegrated. I didn't want to live anymore. Whats the point when the only thing you've ever loved doesn't love you back?

_**-Hospital-**_

"What's going on?" Hikaru asked not grasping the full picture as usual.

"You asshole!" Kyoya said punching Hikaru in the face.

"What the fuck Kyoya?" Hikaru yelled holding his now bleeding nose.

"You were Kaoru's only reason for living. You and you alone. And when you turned him down, you destroyed his will to live."

Kyoya said going for another punch.

"I can't be his only reason for living" Hikaru said dodging the punch this time.

"You were. He loved you and you alone with all of his heart. And you broke it. You've destroyed your brother's pure heart" Kyoya explained further.

"Wha... Oh my god! What have I done?" Hikaru asked as things started to click a bit more now.

"You've destroyed your brother's will to live. Therefore you've pretty much killed him yourself" Kyoya said as he walked out of the room.

Hikaru stood there dumbfounded. Kyoya had never hit anyone before. Hikaru started to think about his brother. He thought about how close they used to be, and all the fun they used to have. He then tried to imagine life without Kaoru, needless to say, it didn't go so well.

"I have to find it's too late" Hikaru said dashing out of the hospital frantically trying to search for his younger brother.

_**-Kaoru-**_

I've collapsed. I have ran across town and my legs caved underneath me. But I'm almost there, just a few more blocks. I rest for a minute before I realize that running away won't solve my problems. Nor would hiding, so I decided on the one thing that could truly stop my pain. I then remembered that I passed a cliff not too far back.

"Kaoru!" I heard someone shout from behind me.

That was my cue. I took off in a dead sprint towards the cliff. Whoever this person is, they are going to be the only witness to my death. The cliff came into view, and my eyes started to fill with tears. Not with sad tears but happy tears. Soon, I wouldn't be hurting anymore.

As soon as I reached the cliff a hand was on my shoulder pulling me away. I struggled and fought, but it won and pulled me back.

"What do you want?" I asked closing my eyes.

"You to stay alive" it said in response.

Wait. That voice. it's not just anyone's it's...

"Hikaru?" I asked looking up.

"Kaoru, please don't leave me" he pleaded gripping me tighter.

"But Hikaru, with me gone, nothing ill be holding you back" I said trying to convince him to let me jump.

"There would be something holding me back if I did let you jump" he said quickly.

"And what is that?" I asked.

"The memory of you!" he shouted.

This shocked me. He doesn't fully hate me? But I thought for sure he hated me.

"You...You don't hate me?" I asked still in a bit of shock.

"I could never hate you. How could I hate the one I love?" he said emphasizing the word love.

"Don't. please don't say things that aren't true" I begged as more tears fell down my face.

"They are true. Kaoru look at me!" he demanded.

I don't look up. I don't want him to see my tear stained face. But he did something that made my eyes almost pop out of my head. He kissed me.

His lips were just as soft as I thought. He prodded against my lips in order to deepen the kiss. Once I came back to my sense,I kissed back with all my might. We stayed like that, lips locked, for a good amount of time before we broke for air.

"Believe me now?" he asked with his usually cocky arrogant smile.

My response was one I severely wanted for so long. I leaned over and placed a kiss on his lips, that of which he seemed to enjoy.

_**Author's Note: **__**Hey I know it's been a while. But I haven't forgot. Things have just been a bit heck-tick. Anyway, leave a review and I'll respond to it. Also check out another story I posted on a site called Wattpad. My account name there is camteen17. Its a corpse party fic. Anyway I love you all and I will see you guys in the next chapter. Bye!**_

_**END OF CHAPTER**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Review Responses:**_

_**animefollower: thanks and yes you can be expecting a few more chapters.**_

_**Sailorlovesbows: thank you for reviewing. I appreciate the compliment as well.**_

_**Story:**_

He called a cab and drove me back to the hospital after we'd been soaking for about 30 minutes. We just smiled and talked about things on the way back.

"So Hikaru, what made you change your mind about us?" I asked looking at a bluish spot on his face that I hadn't noticed till know.

"Let's just say I chatted with Kyoya then did some thinking" he responded.

"Okay. Well whatever Kyoya said must've had a real impact on you to make you think that much" I said laughing a bit.

We reached the hospital and I walked back to my room while he checked with the nurse. He was checking to make sure I could go back there and that I was still legally in that room.

The rest of the group came filing in after Hikaru had texted them. They found us when I was in his arms and was sniggled into his chest. They smiled at us, for they must've known how much we'd been through. And they hugged us but looked at each other like they were waiting for something. Only one of the regular group was missing but I didn't care. I had Hikaru and that's all that mattered.

I noticed a particular blonde had a frown in his face. I was about to ask what was wrong, but decided against it. If he wanted to tell me, then he'll tell me. And I don't want to push him to talk about something he isn't ready to talk about.

"Kaoru, may I speak to you?" Tamaki asked gesturing out into the hallway.

"Umm I kind of can't" I said blushing a little.

I smiles though as I snuggled even further into his embrace. I feel protected and comfortable in this position.

"Okay later then" he said sternly.

"Mmmm Kao?" Hikaru said sleepily.

"Yes Hikaru, it's me" I said as he combed his fingers through my auburn hair.

"Good" he said hugging me tighter.

"Kao, you can actually go home again" the nurse said upon entering the room.

"Thank you I replied with a genuine smile.

"Well Kao, shall we be off?" Hikaru asked putting his arm around my shoulder.

"Okay Hikaru, but let me change first" I said as I grabbed my clothes.

I wanted to him near me, just in case something happened. I need him to protect me. I need his soothing voice telling me everything will be alright. I need his hand to roam through my hair lovingly. I need him to hold me storm.

We reached a bathroom and I quickly slipped inside. I went too the first stall and took off the hospital gown. It crumpled on the floor and I slipped on a pair of boxers. I started to think about what Tamaki wanted to tell me. I had just buttoned up my jeans when I heard a thump from outside the bathroom. I quickly pulled my shirt over my head and ran from the stall. U yanked open the bathroom door and died. The scene in front of me was Hikaru on top of Karuhi kissing.

At that moment, I had never wanted to die more. He had lied to me. He told me he loved me. Am I that useless to him? I dropped the necklace I always wore and gasped. He heard me and broke their kiss and looked up at me. He also noticed my most prized necklace was on the foor.

"Kao, listen" he tried.

"No! Its obvious you don't love me!" I yell.

I ran. Outside of the hospital and down a few blocks. I knew where I wanted to go, and it wasn't a cliff this time. I just kept on running, even after my phone started to ring.

Once the destination became visible, my eyes once again clouded with tears. Not of sadness, but of joy. It was joy because they would never look for me here. I reached the door an knocked. I just hoped I wouldn't be turned away.

"Who is it?" I hear from the inside.

"Kaoru Hitachiin" I respond wiping my eyes.

The door was quickly flung open to reveal the desired teen. He looked at me questioningly, then smiled and let me in.

"So Kaoru, why have you come so late at night?" He asked.

"I...I" I started.

Then it happened. I started to cry so much nore than I ever have. I could've flooded his house had I kept up the rate I was crying at. I was hugging him as well. I squeezed him with all my might because I really needed a friend right now.

"Shhhhh, Kaoru, everything is going to be alright" he said calmly running his hands through my hair.

"I...saw Hika...ru and... Haruhi...kissing...tonight" I managed in between sobs.

"What!? Oh my god, Kaoru that's horrible" he said hugging me back.

I looked up into his deep violet/bluish eyes. They twinkle in the light. They are truly beautiful, no he is truly beautiful. But he caught me staring and smiled a bit.

"Kaoru, I've wanted to you like this for so longlong" he said keeping his goofy smile.

You wha? You wanted to hold me?" I asked in a state of disbelief.

"Yeah, the way you look at the Host Club when Hikaru held you made me envious of him" he said while he laughed a little bit.

"But, Tamaki, I thought you fell for Kyoya" I said still not quite grasping the big picture.

"I admit he is attractive, but compared to you, he's blown right out of the water. Your sparkling eyes that I get lost in. Your beautiful smile that I now barely see. And the adorable blush that is spreading across your face" he said and laughed a bit more.

I hadn't noticed it, but I was blushing. And when he pointed it out, the blush only got worse. I was probably as red as a tomato when he spoke again.

"When I heard what happened to you today, I wanted to murder that doctor.

"I though Hika cared about me" I said as more tears formed in my eyes.

"When I saw you guys together in that bed, I would've given anything to trade spots with him. And to know he's hurt you this way, is unforgivable to me" he said clenching his hands into fists.

"Tamaki, it's okay, now I know how he truly feels about me" I said soothingly.

"But she shouldn't feel this way about you. If he were half as smart as 'his' homework he hands in, then he would know you're way better than just a brother" Tamaki yelled.

I looked up into his fierce blue eyes and looks into my olive ones. He looked a bit puzzled when I started to lean forward, but he caught on soon enough. He closed his eyes and started leaning in as well. I closed my eyes soon after he closed his, and eventually our lips met. His lips brushed against mine as we were tightly embraced. He pulled away and smiled at me. I did the same and smiled at him.

"You're blushing, Kaoru" he said with a child-like giggle.

How could I not? I had an extremely hot guy, who liked me, missing me. Would you be able to hold back a blush?

_**Author's Note: **__** He it is, chapter 7. Were almost done with this story but I need your help. Who should Kaoru end up wit? His blonde new interest or keep the twins love? (I might also do what I feel but it would help with your feedback as well) Thank you for reading and Till next time. Bye**_

_**END OF CHAPTER**_


	8. UpdateNotice

_**This Is Not A Chapter! Its An Update!**_

_**Basically the only way I can see making everyone happy is to do an alternate ending kinda thing. **_

_**If you're one of those TamaKao lovers than that will be the last Chapter for this story. But don't feel like your being cheated, I will treat it as any other chapter.**_

_**And for those HikaKao fans, that will be the second to last. It will hopefully be eaqually as good/bad as the rest of the story. (I'm quite self critical)**_

_**Thanks for reading this and if you only want to read youre ending, that's okay. Just make sure you leave a revuewbtelling me what it is you thought. As always see you next time. Thanks for listening/reading (to) this.**_

_**END OF UPDATE**_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Review Responses**_

_**Animefollower: **__**I understand where you're coming from, so this chapter was made for the people who sided with you. Also thanks for reading.**_

_**Guest:**__** The next chapter will be your desired ending then. Thanks for reviewing :)**_

_**Groovieshark:**__** Thanks for the review and once again the next chapter will be the one you wanted.**_

_**Vannaluv:**__** Thank you for reviewing and these chapters should help you make up your mind.**_

_**(Different) Guest:**__** I'm sorry you feel that way. Others don't seem to think so, but I do agree with you. I'm not that talented either. But thank you for telling me your honest thoughts.**_

_**Magicalfoxes:**__** Thank you so much for your feedback. I love your story as well (Check out his story"KyoKao Collection") And I will take into consideration what it is you've said.**_

_**Kitaru arashi:**__** I"m not that evil. Good always comes out of bad. just sometimes the good could to lead to even more bad. And I'm sorry for the shed tears.**_

_**P.S. **__**There is a way to see reviews so if you want to see what others are saying, you could check it out.**_

_**STORY:**_

"Kaoru, are you sure you want to go further?" Tamaki asked after he broke our kiss.

"To be honest, I have no idea what it is I want" I said shrugging my shoulders.

"Well then, let's take a break for now. Then resume later if that's what you want" he said standing up.

"Where are you going?" I asked curiously.

"To prepare my room, you didn't think I'd let you sleep out here, did you?" he laughed.

"I kinda did, actually" I said honestly.

"What kind of host would I be if I caused my guests discomfort?" he asked in a mocking tone.

I laughed and continued to sit on the couch as he prepped his bedroom for me. As I sit there I start to wonder what Hikaru is doing right now. I'm so deep in thought at this point that I don't hear Tamaki calling for me. I start to wonder if he was/is out looking for me.

~Probably not. He's probably making out with Haruhi on our bed right now.~ I thought as more tears came to my eyes.

"Hello? Earth to Kaoru" I heard Tamaki say.

"Oh, sorry Tamaki, I was lost in thought" I responded.

"I could tell. My room is presentable. What were you thinking so hard about?" he asked me as he led me toward the staircase.

"Hikaru" I said as tear spilled down my face.

"Shhh. Kaoru, it's okay. I'm here for you" he said pulling me into another hug.

We stayed like this fro a good 5 minutes. He smelled of fresh roses and that scent right after a rain storm. (I couldn't think of how to describe that scent). I just kept inhaling it until he finally released me.

We walked down along hallway, and it was well decorated to say the least. There were beautiful marble columns, paintings and flower vases. But one painting stood out in particular. it was one of Tamaki and his grandmother. I don't think I've ever seen a smile on her face. She was always cold to Tamaki, so I don't see how she agreed to be next to him in a portrait. But ho well, it was a lovely painting because it captured Tamaki's beauty perfectly.

"I know it's a little messy,but I hope it's alright" He said opening the door to his room.

"Tamaki, your room looks spotless. And it is amazing. Thank you for letting me stay here, even though you didn't have to" I said blushing a little.

"I would never turn away a friend in we should probably get to bed" He said grabbing 2 sets of pajamas.

"You don't have to grab a set for me, I sleep in my clothes usually" I said turning down his offer.

"Oh okay. Be back in a flash" he said disappearing into his bathroom.

"Tamaki, you don't have to change in there. We're both guys, we have the same thing down there. There is no need to be shy" I said with a slight chuckle.

"Kaoru I'm not shy. I'm just self conscious.

" Okay. I'm going to make myself comfortable if that's okay" I said flopping down on his bed.

"Make yourself at home" he replied through the door again.

I just later on his bed, waiting for him to come out of the bathroom. The longer I waited, the colder I became, so I decided to crawl under the blankets for warmth. I became drousy very quickly and was soon asleep.

"Kaoru wake up"

"Huh...what?" I said sitting up slowly.

"Relax. Its just me. You know, you're adorable when you sleep. I just had to get a picture of it" he laughed dragging me out of the bed.

"Wait why are you pulling me out of bed? Did I do something wrong?" I asked.

"No no your were fine" he replied.

"Then where are we going and why are we going there?"

"Wait and see" he said pulling me down the stairs.

I was being dragged out of the front door by the wrist. Tamaki was being stubborn as usual. He threw me into a limo, climbed in after me, then told the driver to go to some random location. This was pure torture, for all I knew, Tamaki could've snapped and was kidnapping me.

"Tamaki please" I pleaded.

"Fine, here's the picture" he said holding his phone out.

I had to admit, I didn't look terrible. My auburn hair covered part of my face, and my face itself looked relaxed. My shape made it seem that I was smaller than I actually was. And there was the tiniest hint of a blush on my face that made me look appealing.

"We're here" he said shutting off his phone, making me realize we'd stopped.

Wait I never wanted to see that picture. Oh that sneaky little...

"Kaoru?"

"Hikaru" I said coldly.

"Kao, look, let me explain"

"Why? So you can describe how much you don't love me? How much you gate m..."

I was silenced by a pair of lips touching my own. I started to protest but eventually gave in. I kissed back and fell into him, as he put his arms around me. I inwardly smiled. I missed the feel of his lips. Wait. His lips were connected with Haruhi's not even 4 hours ago.

I broke the kiss and stared at him. He and to catch his breath but then began to speak.

"Kao, I know what you think you saw at the hospital, but she kissed me then pulled me to the ground"

"Yeah right" I scoffed.

"Kyoya believes me Kao. And he doesn't believe anything but the truth"

"Hikaru, it hurt to see you guys like that" I said as a year slid down my face.

"I know. But you're the only love for me" he said taking my hand.

"And you're my only love Hikaru" I said looking into his dreamy eyes.

We slowly leaned in and eventually our lips connected again. He immediately wraps his arms around me. I soon snake my hand up his shirt and roamed his torso. Eventually we had to break for air.

"Wow. Oh hey, Hikaru, check out this picture of Kaoru" Tamaki said holding up his phone.

"Tamaki, why is he in MY spot?" A dark shadowy voice asked.

"That doesn't matter. He's a adorable" Tamaki replied.

"He truly is" Hikaru agreed.

"Be that as it may, no one sleeps in my spot" Kyoya said growing a dark aura around him.

I left Hikaru arms and hugged Kyoya. He just stood there awkwardly as my arms encircled his body. He soon hugged back which prices he has at least a little but of love in the dark atlura filled body. I released and went back over to Hikaru and yawned.

My eyelids started to close and I fell asleep. The last sight I remember seeing was Tamaki sharing a kiss with Kyoya. The held each other and I could here their tounges battling for dominance.

I awoke the next morning knowing that it was my first with Hikaru by my side. And that's all I'll ever need. He is my one, my only, my true love. Whether I'm his or not I'm sure that as long as he's around, I'll be happy.

_**Author's Note: **__** So I hope this chapter was everything that was expected of a HikaKao ending. Sorry for no lemon but I'm not good at that. So imagine yourself what they did the nights after this story takes place. (Wink) Anyway the final chapter is an alternate ending where Kaoru ends up with Tamaki. Keep updates so you'll know when that's uploaded. **_

_**P.s. I'm sorry it took so long to upload my laptop is being stupid so I will post from my hpkne until further notice. Also I will write the next chapter from my head instead of transferring it from paper. I appreciate your patience and I hope you liked this chapter. Until next time. Bye :)**_

_**Hikaru Ending End**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**I Wont Answer Reviews in this chapter due to it being an alternate ending. There might be a surprise for those interested in a possible third ending.**_

_**Story:**_

"Kaoru, are you sure you want to do this?" Tamaki asked breaking the kiss.

"To be honest, I don't know" I said shyly.

"Well, then let's stop for now, but if you decide this is what you want, we can continue later" He said getting up.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"To prepare my room, you didn't think I'd let you sleep out here did you?" He laughed.

"I kind of did" I replied honestly.

"What kind of host would I be, if I caused my guest discomfort?" He asked in a mocking tone.

I laughed and he left to go prepare his bedroom. I sat there when all of a sudden my pocket started to vibrate. I saw Hikaru's picture and decided to answer it.

"Hello"

"Kaoru, don't come home"

"What? Hika why would you say that to me?" I asked as tears started to form in my eyes

"Because what you feel for me is sick. I dotn want a perv around me" he spat.

I had enough. I threw my phone against Tamaki's wall. My phone shattered but I didn't care. My heart shattered again and I couldn't take it anymore. I walked into Tamaki's kitchen and searched for his kitchen knives. I eventually found one that would suffice and lifted my sleeves.

"Goodbye Tamaki, Kyoya, Honey and Mori. I love you all" I said as I placed the knife to my pale wrist.

I just started to slide it when a big force knocked me down. I looked up to see who it was and was shocked to say the least.

It was Tamaki!

"What are you doing Kaoru?" He asked

"Sparing you and all the people on Earth from having to see me" I yelled back.

"Why would anyone not want to see your beautiful face?" Tamaki asked.

"Ask Hikaru" I spat angrily.

"Why would I..."

"He told me he never wanted to see me again"

"He What!?"

"He said I was a perv and that what I felt for him was sick. Who would want to live with a perv?"

"Kaoru, listen to me, Hikaru is a moron to let a brother like you go. And why would he say this, if he was in your lap earlier?"

"I guess because Haruhi talked to him and convinced him I was a sick person" I responded.

"That bitch!" He yelled.

"She's right though. No one wants a perv like me near then. Not even you, so just let me do the world a favor" I said standing back up.

"No, she's wrong. You are amazing Kaoru, and I want you near me" he said knocking the knife from my grip.

"You what?" I asked because I wasn't sure I heard him correctly.

"I know you heard me. I want you near me Kaoru, I love you" Tamaki said with a bit of anger.

"Don't, please don't lie to me" I said as tears welled in my eyes.

"I'm not lying. I do love you Kaoru" He said pulling closer to me.

"No you can't love me. No one would ever love me"

He did not respond, instead he pressed his lips against mine again. I melted into him as he deepend the kiss. His tongue presses on my bottom lip begging for entrance. I obliched and he immediately slid in my mouth exploring every inch. I broke the kiss because I needed air, and I assume he did as well.

"Listen to me. I love you Kaoru, whether or not you feel the same way is a different story. Just know that I want to be with you and I want to see you happy" He said pulling me closer to him.

Hey Tamaki I'm tired, can we go to sleep?" I asked after a yawn escaped me.

"Sure just let me get some pyjamas for us" he sadi walking toward his dresser.

"No that's fine. I sleep usually in my underwear, so Ill just climb into bed and get ready that way" I suggested.

"Okay. Be right back" he said disappearing into the bathroom.

I heard the door lock, and I slipped out of my shirt. I undid my belt and unzipped/unvuttoned my pants and took those off as well. I took both of my socks off and I relaxed. I just couldn't get a certain feeling out of my head.

-What if Tamaki is just using me to make Kyoya jealous?-

The door opening snapped me out of my thoughts and in the doorway stood Tamaki in his boxers. There was a brown bear face that resembled his teddy bear's in a weird way. But he looked damn good in them.

"So Kaoru, what now?" He asked.

"We sleep or, you know" I said as I winked at him.

His face got so red and I just had to laugh. Now it was him with the adorable blush. But something about him right now, I found very irresistible.

_Ring Ring Ring_

"Hello?" I asked inot the annoyance that was Tamaki's phone.

I can hear a muffled voice but I can't make out what its saying?

"No Haruhi, I'm not interested. Goodbye" He said as he snapped his phone shut.

"Why was she calling you?" I asked slightly annoyed.

"She wanted to know if I still wanted to date her. She said her and Hikaru broke up because he is an asshole" He said filling me in.

"He isn't an asshole. She is just a manipulative bitch" I spat.

"Kaoru, he called you things no one should ever call someone else" Tamaki protested.

"But Haruhi was probably behind it. She probably bribed him with things like sex" I said trying to defend Hikaru.

"Kaoru..."

"Yes Tamaki?" I asked.

"I love you. You know that right?" He asked looking deep into my olive eyes.

"Of course I do. And Tamaki, I love you too" I said turning off my bedside lamp.

He slung his arms over my waist and I snuggled into his chest. I felt safe and protected from harm when I was like this. I just hope ge still holds me like this for as long as he is able to. Because I love Tamaki and he loves me. Together we can overcome anything.

_**Author's Note: I'm so sorry this took so long. Cross Country started up and Ive been busy with my laptop and friends and such. There will be a third ending. I'm not giving any spoilers, so you'll have to watch and see when is posted. Thank you for reading and as always, much love, until next time. Bye**_

_**End Of Chapter**_

_**Tamaki Ending End**_


	11. Chapter 11

_**This is the final chapter to this story. It is the second alternate ending but definitely the most 'realistic'. I hope you enjoy and continue to support my other stories. I am on Wattpad under the name camteen17, so if you want to check me out, feel free. I also post stories on there that won't make it onto here, so if you want, follow me on that too. But anyway, enough of that, time to get on with the story.**_

_**Story:**_

"Kaoru, are you sure you want to do this?" Tamaki asked breaking our kiss.

"To be honest, I don't know what I want" I said shyly.

"Well then, let's stop for now, then resume later if you decide you want to" he said standing up.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"To prepare my room. You didn't think I'd let you sleep out here did you?" He laughed.

"Honestly, I kinda did" I said rubbing my head.

"What kind of host would I be, if I caused my guest discomfort?" He asked in a mocking tone.

I laughed and continued to sit on the couch as he prepped his bedroom for me. As I sit there I got a text from Hikaru.

~Kaoru, don't come home for a little bit~

~Why not?~ I asked.

~Because you need time to make your feelings for me go away~

~Hikaru, how can you say that?~ I replied as tears slid down my face.

~Because what you feel for me is wrong. You can't love me this way. You are sick, and until you fix your problem, I don't want to see you. Goodbye Kaoru~

I threw my phone against the wall as I burst out crying.

Tamaki must have heard me, and ran to check on me.

"Kaoru, what's wrong?" He asked.

"Hikaru doesn't want to speak to me ever again" I said as more tears escaped my eyes.

"Well, you were brothers. That is gross" he replied.

"What?" I said through sobs.

"Kaoru, loving your brother is sick. I invited you in so you would feel good, but I cant pretend anymore. What you feel for Hikaru is wrong" he was almost yelling now.

"Tamaki. I'm going to leave. There is no point in staying at a place I'm hated at" I said standing from the couch.

I walked to the front door, went outside and ran all the way to the nearest kitchen supply shop. I walked in and went to the utensils section. I found what I was looking for, and went to the counter.

"Is this all sir?" The cashier lady asked.

"That will be it for me" I said simply handing over the money.

I left the store an headed to my favorite place. The Ouran rose maze. Once I was there I found a gazebo and sat down. I took one last smell of the beautiful roses as I lifted me sleeve. I took my grocery out of the baf and held it to my wrist. I pressed hard and slid it across.

Almost immidiatley, blood started to pour out. I was crying again. Not if sadness, but of joy. At least now everyone will be happier that I'm gone.

My vision starts to get blurry as I lay my head back and just wait for my life to completely drain from me. I think I hear calls in the distance, but they are too late. Now my eyes won't ipen, they are too heavy. And I start to see a white light at the end of a dark tunnel. Voices started chanting and calling me to go into the light.

"Kaoru. Come into the light, the darkness is bad"

"Kaoru, the light will bring happiness. It will bring joy"

I followed the voices into the light. I was able to see again, accept I couldn't move. There are people's around me, as I try to speak I can't open my mouth. Then the realization hit me like a Brock wall.

I was dead.

-2 Weeks Later-

"We are gathered here today to remember the life of Kaoru Hitachiin. A brother, a son, and a friend. We will now lsiten to some word prepared by his loved ones." A man in a black robe said as he stepped off the pedestal.

"I have only known Kaoru for about a year, but within the year, we had began to feel like family. He came to me in his most separate times and I helped him. I don't know why he would do this? He had shown no intention the last time I saw him. This is still a shocker to realize, one of the people you love most, is now gone. I am Tamaki Suoh, and Kaoru was like family to me"

Tamaki stepped off the stand, and went back to his seat by Kyoya. Now Hikaru was walking up to the stand.

"I'm Hikaru Hitachiin, and Kaoru was my brother. My twin brother. And for those of you who think twin telepathy si real, it is not. I did not know my brother was about to committ suicide. I was with my ex-girlfriend Haruhi Fujioka. We broke up because she didn't care about Kaoru. When U found out he was dead, she still acted like normal her, as if it didn't affect her. I loved Kaoru so much, that I still cry just saying his name. He will forever live on in my memory as my equal. My twin. My family- ~and my love~ he said in a whisper.

He stepped down from the stage and other came and said their goodbyes. I sat in heaven and watched it alk as those two just lied. They lied about everything they said.

"I'm done watching. Those two just lied so much, its ruined my mood" I said to an angel nearby.

"They didn't lie. They do love you" He said not even glancing upward.

"Oh, and how do you know this?" I asked slightly pissed off.

"I saw everything unfold that night. EVERYTHING" he said emphasising that one word.

"Then enlighten me on what I missed. Tell me what you saw, that I didn't" I said a bit angrier than I was before.

"Better yet, I'll show you" he said leading me to a pool of water.

"Stick your head in and think about what you want to see" he continued.

I did as I was told and saw myself sitting on Tamaki's couch. My phone rang and I knew it was the text. But my picture shifted, and I saw Hikaru and Haruhi. Hikaru then left to go the bathroom, and Haruhi picked up his phone. My picture got a close up and I saw that she was typing the message that Hikaru sent me. She hit send and I continued to watch as she sent the messages to me pretending to be my brother. Just as Hikaru was comingnout of the bathroom, my picture shifted again.

This time it showed Tamaki in his room, but tied up tonhis bed, with a gag on. Someone else was in his room and I guess they did that to him. Theyvput on a. Blonde wig, Put on some makeup and some blue contacts then went downstairs. I followed them and then saw they conversation I had between me and Tamaki. I saw myself run from the house, but then shifted upstairs to see Tamaki breaking free of his ropes.

I pulled my head out of the water and my eyes were wide. Haruhi played me. She sent fake textsz then hired a guy to dress like Tamaki, and insult me. She is such a...

"See, I wasn't lying. and neither were they" the angel said breaking my thoughts.

"Oh no! What have I done?" I yelled as it hit me. I hurt them when they didn't deserve it.

And I asked the angel to leave dor a little bit. He obliged and I was left alone.

For that's how it had always been, me alone.

_**Author's Note: There you have it. The end to this story. Thanks to all of you who followed it, and me. And thank you to all who reviewed and gave me feedback. I appreciate the support from this story and might do more like it on the future. As always see you guys next time.**_

_**THE END**_


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